


here to stay

by lancemclain



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Best Friends, Childhood Friends, Developing Relationship, Domestic Violence, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Getting Together, Growing Up, Homophobic Language, Hurt/Comfort, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Mutual Pining, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, POV Alternating, Self-Acceptance, Slow Build
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-14
Updated: 2017-10-14
Packaged: 2018-12-24 18:37:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 13,345
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12018660
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lancemclain/pseuds/lancemclain
Summary: When they were thirteen, Oikawa started to look at Iwaizumi a little differently. Like he was preparing himself for the moment when Iwaizumi will leave him, just like everybody else. It was pissing Iwaizumi off, so he made a point of proving his best friend that he was here to stay.(this is a story of what it means tobea best friend andhavea best friend.)





	1. Baby steps.

**Author's Note:**

> hi, so first of all: english isn't my first language so sorry if there are any mistakes, please point them out so i can correct!  
> second of all: i..... can't write for shit but i will appreciate any kind of feedback  
> i just love this ship so much i had to write something

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Iwa-chan... Do you promise to always be my friend? Or no, forever is longer than always, right? So will you be my friend forever?" Tooru asked in a small voice when they turned to their street. 
> 
> "Why? You thought you can get rid of me just because you don't like dinosaurs? 'Course I'm gonna be your friend forever, Stupidkawa."
> 
> (they're from one to six years old.)

_"when i wake tomorrow i'll bet_  
_that you and i will walk together again._  
_i can tell that we are gonna be friends."_  
**\- the white stripes**

It all started with Oikawa's little fist hitting Iwaizumi right in the nose.

Iwaizumi should've known that it was a bad sign, he should have screamed so loud that his mother would finally take him out of this bed where he had to lay beside an ugly newborn that kept crying, he should have known that nothing will ever change. But instead Iwaizumi kicked the little boy, which made him cry even louder. Eventually, it was Tooru's mother who came and took out her kid to gently sway him in her arms.

Tooru calmed down and giggled, playing with his rattle. He enthusiastically swung the toy in the air but his little sweaty palms weren't able to hold it, so it flew back to the crib and hit Iwaizumi in the stomach.

Honestly, Iwaizumi should have known better.

* * *

Iwaizumi was a little quicker with everything than Oikawa, but Tooru's mother didn't really worry about that. Hajime was a month older, after all, and all kids are different when it comes to learning new things.

Hajime was doing mini-pushups by his third month, he could hold up his head and chest on his little arms for at least three seconds before flopping back down to the soft mattress where his mother always put him to play. Tooru started pushing himself up when he was five months old.

Hajime learned how to sit by his sixth month, and when he reached seventh he already started to crawl around more. Tooru couldn't sit until he was nine months old and started to crawl only when he reached eleven months. By this time Hajime was able to stand up by putting his small hands on the coffee table or sofa, while Tooru kept crawling behind him and patting his chubby hands on the wooden floor just outside of the mattress. 

"Your boy can already stand on his own, look at him! Any moment now he'll start to walk," Oikawa's mom said, looking thoughtfully at the two boys in the living room. Iwaizumi's mom looked up at that, her gaze lingering on the smaller boy.

"Tooru is taking his time, hm?" she smiled fondly. Hajime carefully bent his knees and flopped down on his diaper, cheerfully clapping his hands until Tooru crawled behind him to pat him on the back. Hajime's mouth made a little popping sound, his eyes opened wider and he clumsily turned around to look down at Tooru. Then Hajime patted Tooru's head in return, but it must've been a little too hard because the younger child started crying. 

Although Oikawa did cry a lot, so maybe it was just another one of his fits. His mother walked over to pick her son up and hug him close to her chest. "Yeah. I'm wondering... Do you think he's taking a little... too much time?" the woman sighed, gently caressing her son's head. Hajime was curiously looking up, his green eyes glimmering in the sunlight coming to the room through the open windows.

"Well, my Hajime is older, that for one. And two, I don't think you should worry at all. I mean, there are still things that Tooru's better at than my son," Hajime's mother laughed.

It was true. There was one thing Tooru was "better at", or rather "quicker" than Hajime. It was, unsurprisingly, talking. By his fourth month Tooru was babbling so loud and so often that his parents got flat out annoyed because there was always some noise coming from the little boy, along with incredible amount of saliva. His mother always sang old lullabies around him, so when he was six months old he was able to repeat the melody after her, even if it only consisted of  _ba-ba-ba's_  and  _pa-ta-ta's_. 

Tooru was also the first one to actually pronounce a word. It happened during Hajime's first birthday, but then again, that was also the day Hajime walked on his own for the first time, making an impressive amount of five steps before flopping back on his ass. So it was a big day for both of the families. 

Tooru's first word wasn't  _mama_  or  _dada_ , like his parents would suspect. It was "Haime". To anyone else it would sound like some more blabbering, but to their mothers it was clear that Tooru just tried to say his friend's name, because Tooru was sitting next to Hajime in their fancy birthday hats while grabbing Hajime's ear with his palm.  _J_  was apparently too hard for Tooru, so he found his own, simpler version. With the amount of time the boys were spending together, it wasn't anything weird. 

By the time they were both three, they could carry a simple conversation with their parents about their surroundings. Sometimes their mothers would walk into a room to find both boys seated in front of each other and clapping their hands to some child's rhyme they could often hear at the park. They were messing up more times than not, but with each day they were getting better because if Hajime could do something, Tooru felt the need to learn how to do the same.

When they were four, Tooru was the one who kept asking an unbelievable amount of questions. Hajime was more quiet, calm, and when he actually had a question, it was something that would surprise his mother for a moment, like "is the time real if it never ends?" or "why do you sometimes cry when you're happy?". Tooru, on the other hand, asked about  _everything_ ; why aren't there dinosaurs anymore, why can't we see other planets without those big things they show on tv, how small are people on the radio, when are you gonna die. The boy had literally no filter and his mom usually gave up after his sixth question and told him to go ask his older sister or play with Hajime.

And since his sister always told him to "get lost", whatever that meant, Tooru asked Hajime, like the one month difference between them was big enough so Iwaizumi could learn that much more and answer his questions. But the funniest thing about it was that Hajime never turned Tooru down. 

"Iwa-chan, if your eyes are green, does that mean you see everything in green?"

"I don't know, your eyes are brown but does that mean you see everything in brown? That's a crappy color," Hajime answered, flinching a little at his mothers scandalized squeal from behind them where she was sitting on the bench with Tooru's mom. He heard the word  _crappy_  from his father when he was watching a baseball match one time, he thought it's a funny word. But apparently not to his mother.

"Well... no, but brown is... brown, it's boring. Green is a pretty color, like blue. I thought that maybe if people have pretty eyes, they see everything in pretty colors," Tooru shrugged a little. Hajime frowned, absentmindedly pushing Tooru's swing when it came back down. 

"My Ma says all colors are pretty and it's not nice to laugh at other people because of how they look. You can't change your eye color," Hajime said louder and pushed higher, making Tooru giggle. 

"Hajime, don't push him too hard or he will fall!" his mother called and Hajime waved to signal that he heard her. He knew that, of course. He pushed too hard one time and Tooru fell on his knees, there was blood and Tooru was screaming for good two hours. Hajime wouldn't want to make that happen again, his head hurt after.

"We all see the same colors. And your eyes aren't boring, it's not a nice thing to say," the dark haired boy pointed out, remembering his mom's words. He hoped Tooru already forgot that Hajime just said that his eyes have a crappy color. That wasn't nice, too. "Do you want to go to the slide now? We can go to the big one and catch each other so we won't scratch our hands again."

"Yeah! Let's go to the big one like big kids!" Tooru yelled excitedly. He jumped from the swing before it came down again, he landed on his hands and scratched them anyway, but this time he didn't cry. He was too hyped over the slide, so Hajime didn't say anything because if Tooru didn't notice, then everything was okay.

* * *

"There's a ghost in my house."

Five years old Iwaizumi looked up from his sand castle to look at Oikawa who stood above him with a thoughtful expression on his face. That face was never good.

"What ghost?" Iwaizumi asked, abandoning his work to pay more attention to his friend. His  _only_  friend.

By this time their mothers were a little worried that the boys never played with anyone else. They were always running around the playground together, catching each other on the slides or pushing each other's swings, while completely ignoring other groups of kids that were there, too. It was always better than playing alone, though, so they figured out it's because the boys were together practically since they were born. They were glad that Hajime and Tooru liked each other so much.

"A moaning ghost," Tooru answered, crouching down next to Hajime, so they were on the same eye-level. Hajime cocked his head to one side, raising an eyebrow. "I can't sleep sometimes and then I hear it. It's not very loud and it doesn't happen everyday, but when I ask my Ma if she heard it, she always says no with a weird face, like that," the boy said and then tried to show Hajime what face his mom makes. 

Hajime was looking at Tooru for a few seconds and then he rolled his eyes, lightly hitting Oikawa upside the head. "You're stupid."

"Ouch, Iwa-chan is such a bully!" Tooru cried, rubbing the spot where Hajime's hand hit. Iwaizumi sighed and offered Tooru one of his toys from the sandpit, in case he hit a little too hard. 

"It's not a ghost, you dummy. I heard it, too, but when I asked my mom she told me what it is. It's parents making new babies," Hajime explained with a serious face. He always looked like that when Tooru was being a dummy and he needed to explain something to the younger boy. Hajime did make a big deal out of this one month difference.

Tooru's brown eyes opened wider. And just like that the boy accepted his friend's explanation. "New babies? But why do they need new babies? And where do they keep them? Iwa-chan, do you know?" he asked eagerly, getting on his dirty knees to put his face in Hajime's space. Iwaizumi put his hand on Tooru's cheek and pushed his face away.

"I don't know. Maybe they eat them, like witches," he wondered, smirking under his nose. 

Tooru rubbed his cheek, squinting his eyes at the other five year old. "My Ma's not a witch. She told me," he muttered quietly, looking away before jumping to his feet, a moaning  ghost long forgotten. "Do you want to help me find my manners?" Tooru asked cheerfully, his brown and slightly curly hair falling to his eyes. 

"Your... ma-manners?" Iwaizumi repeated, stuttering a little on a new word. "What's that?"

Tooru shrugged. "I'm not sure yet, but my sister told me that I'm awful and I should go find my manners. We can look together, Iwa-chan!" 

"Drop the stupid nickname and maybe I'll help you."

"Iwa-chan is so mean!"

"Do you want me to beat you up with a stick?"

In the end they didn't find Tooru's manners and when they told that to his older sister, she made an ugly noise and said she's not surprised at all. But that night Hajime's mother let him stay at Tooru's, so they weren't bothered by those mysterious manners that couldn't be found.

They've made a blanket fort to watch movies in the living room and when Tooru's mom finally told them it's bedtime, they crawled into Tooru's bed together. Oikawa had many little fluorescent stars on his ceiling, but it never bothered any of them. Hajime liked to count them because whenever he came over, there were new additions to his friend's collection. He even asked his mom to buy some more for Tooru because he knew how the boy likes them.

"How many tonight?" Tooru whispered, nudging Hajime a little with his elbow.

"Fifty-two," Hajime replied easily and he could hear Tooru's huff. He knew Tooru only can count to forty and he always whined about it until Hajime agreed to help him learn the next ten. "Where is your dad, Tooru? My mom said it was long since she saw him," the boy said after a moment, turning to look at the smaller boy. 

"Mama says he's working a lot," Tooru answered with a pout. "I miss him."

"He's gonna be home soon for sure," Hajime said, trying to lighten up the mood. He didn't like when Tooru was sad, so he offered to hold his hand until they fall asleep.

Tooru seemed content. 

* * *

When they're six years old, things change a little.

All kids in their neighborhood were the dinosaurs kids, Iwaizumi belonged to them, too. So of course Oikawa hated dinosaurs and became the space kid.

He saw an American movie about aliens on TV and he was hooked since then, asking his mom about space ships, planets, stars. He would often drag Hajime out during warm summer nights to lay on the grass in his backyard and look at the constellations. Tooru couldn't pronounce "pterodactyl", but the word "Cassiopeia" easily slipped through his mouth like it was nothing, while Hajime always spit on his chin whenever he tried to repeat it. Oikawa fiercely believed in aliens and he wasn't afraid to say it, even when mean kids from the playground were laughing at him.

It's not that Hajime wanted to abandon Tooru, it's just that he was more interested in catching bugs or drawing dinosaurs than reading about some guy named Roosevelt and Area 51. So Iwaizumi played with other kids, while Oikawa sat on his porch and drew the solar system, trying to learn the order of the planets. Oikawa was always different.

Oikawa was also jealous because Iwa-chan never had time for him these days, he preferred to play with big kids and their stupid plastic dinosaurs, or- or catching ugly spiders to his glass jar beside the river. He was supposed to be Tooru's best friend! So Oikawa sulked for days, dragging his feet around the house and ignoring Neesan that was laughing at him. She was always rude anyway.

One day Tooru decided to go to the playground alone, because the day was nice. (And his mother started to raise her voice at him which was never a good sign.) Iwa-chan wasn't there, but the big kids he played with were on the swings. Tooru slowly made his way to the sandpit to build a sad little castle with a lonely prince who was abandoned by another prince who suddenly wanted to be a peasant. 

At six years old Tooru's self-esteem was incredibly high, to say the least.

But when he finished building a real pretty thing that even Mineko-san would appreciate, the big mean kids came over and ruined everything, at the same time throwing sand at Tooru's face. The smaller boy yelped and rubbed his eyes that were now hurting whenever he tried to blink.

"What are you doing, you dummy?!" Tooru cried, trying to stand up. He was pushed back to the sand in no time and he still couldn't even open his eyes to see which of the kids pushed him. He would totally tell his mom.

"Who're you calling a dummy, you doofus?" one of the boys asked. Oikawa recognized his voice, it was Kamitani, the meanie who laughed at him when Tooru said that aliens are in space and they can see them. The aliens would kick Kamitani's stupid ass if they wanted to! "Why did you come alone, huh? Your only friend doesn't want to listen about your stupid aliens anymore?"

"Aliens aren't stupid! Dinosaurs are," Tooru defended, wiping the tears from his eyes. At least the sand disappeared and even though his vision was still blurry, he could make out three big bodies in front of him. Three on one? What would Iwa-chan say? Crappy odds, that's right. But they were always crappy for him; he was smaller than other boys his age, he didn't have as many toys as other kids, big boys always liked to push him around. Tooru's mom always said he should pick his battles and Tooru didn't really understand what it means, so he picked all of them.

"Take that back!" another boy said, his feet kicking Tooru's ankle hard enough to make him yelp again. "Aliens aren't real!"

"And Jurassic Park is?!" Tooru shot back, quickly scrambling to his feet and taking a step back.

"'Course it is!"

"Is not!"

"Is too!"

"Is not!"

Kamitani pushed Tooru again, but this time the smaller boy didn't fall. Instead he dug his feet deeper into the sand, raising his fists up. Three other boys laughed at him and attacked at once. It wasn't the first time, so Tooru knew what to expect. They hurt him last week, too. He still had bruises he hid from Iwa-chan when they saw each other. Iwa was always so brave and no one dared to speak bad to him, even older boys, so Tooru didn't want to look like a baby beside his friend.

The bullies pushed him to the dirt again, rubbing his cheek into the sand, while Tooru tried to hit whatever and whoever he could reach. They were kicking and scratching his skin, one of them tugged at Oikawa's hair. The little boy was screaming in fury, but suddenly Kamitani's weight disappeared from his body and he could hear a scream that wasn't his own. Tooru spit out the sand and rubbed his eyes again, sitting up when two other boys left him. His whole body hurt and something warm was dripping from his bottom lip, but right now he didn't care about that. 

Because right now he saw Iwa-chan sitting on Kamitani and hitting the bigger boy's face with his fist. Hajime's black hair was sticking in several directions, his tan skin contrasted with Kamitani's pale one and he looked absolutely pissed.

"You like to pick on younger kids?! How 'bout I pick on you, too?" Iwa-chan asked angrily, pushing himself up when he thought Kamitani has enough. The older boy was practically crying underneath him, his two friends watching everything in stunned silence. "Touch Tooru one more time and I will beat you up with a stick!" he threatened.

Tooru's bullies scattered to their feet and in a flash they were gone. Iwa-chan turned to Oikawa with clenched fists and the smaller boy instinctively slid his ass on the sand to be further away, looking at Hajime with wide eyes. 

"I won't beat  _you_  up, you dummy," Iwa-chan said, getting closer to Tooru. He crouched beside him and used his black shirt to wipe Tooru's face from tears, sand and blood. The younger boy had a split lip and tomorrow he would have an ugly bruise under his right eye. His arms were scratched just like his knees, clothes dirty. All because Hajime left him alone. "I'm sorry," he muttered, looking down at an ugly bruise peeking from under Tooru's sleeve. It must've been an old one, but Hajime never saw it before. 

"For what? You made them go away," Tooru answered quietly, his chocolate eyes scanning his best friend's face. There was his usual scowl etched on his features, had been there since Hajime turned five, Tooru knew.

"But if I would be here with you, they wouldn't bully you in the first place," Hajime explained, feeling like he was about to cry. Which was stupid, because he wasn't the one beaten up. He was stupid, stupid Hajime. "I don't even want to play with other kids anymore. I want to watch stupid alien films with you."

"They're not stupid, Iwa-chan!" Tooru whined and a corner of Hajime's mouth twitched. "I thought you don't want to be my friend anymore," the boy mumbled after a moment, rubbing his eye with a small fist. Iwa-chan's head perked up at that, surprise clear on his dirty face. "Kamitani said you don't want to listen about my stupid aliens, and you were always playing with bigger kids."

Hajime frowned. "Kamitani is stupid, don't listen to him. And if the aliens really are out there, they will take Kamitani first to make experiments on him."

"You really think so?" Oikawa asked, amazement replacing the sullen look. Hajime smiled at that, nodding his head.

"Sure I do. Now come on, mom needs to check your bruises," the older boy said, helping Tooru stand up. It wasn't really necessary, but Hajime still wrapped his arm around Tooru's waist and let his friend wrap his hand around Hajime's arms for support. Iwaizumi was scared that if he'll turn his head even for a moment, those bullies will hurt Tooru again.

"Iwa-chan... Do you promise to always be my friend? Or no, forever is longer than always, right? So will you be my friend forever?" Tooru asked in a small voice when they turned to their street. 

"Why? You thought you can get rid of me just because you don't like dinosaurs? 'Course I'm gonna be your friend forever, Stupidkawa."

"Iwa-chan is such a bully!"

And that was the first time they both knew none of them really wants to stay too long without the other one.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please tell me what you think !!


	2. The start of the volleyball hype.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “What a stupid question, you already almost live here,” Hajime answered, squeezing Tooru’s cheeks between his hands. It made Tooru smile despite himself and it clearly pleased Hajime who smiled back at him. “Will you tell me what happened?”
> 
> “I think my dad left. And he’s not coming back.”
> 
> (they're seven and eight.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw: domestic abuse

_"when you feel like you're slipping under_  
_and the skies are all filled with thunder_  
_look alive ‘cause i'll be on your side."  
_ **\- cin3ma, on your side.**

Oikawa was seven when his mother hit him for the ﬁrst time.  
  
The little boy was so shocked that for a moment he didn’t even feel anything, his eyes were wide, hand automatically raised to his cheek. And only when his ﬁngertips brushed the skin, it all became real. The pain was sharp and made his eyes tear up. Tooru stood there and tried to think what he did to make his mom angry, because maybe he deserved it? He never saw other parents on the playground hitting their kids, Iwa-chan’s mom never hit him either. Maybe Tooru was talking too much again? Maybe he lost his manners? At this point he already knew what that means.  
  
The woman looked as shocked as her son and she quickly knelt in front of him, taking his small face in her hands to gently caress the red cheek with her thumb. “I’m so sorry, baby. I didn’t mean to do it, you know? Mommy is very sorry,” she said in a soft voice. Tooru could only numbly nod his head, watching her with wide brown eyes. “I will never do it again, but you can’t tell anyone, okay? They would take you away,” his mom explained, hugging him tightly to her chest.  
  
Tooru didn’t understand it or who would take him where, but he knew he doesn’t want to go, so he kept nodding. He wouldn’t tell anyone, not even Iwa-chan.  
  
But it wasn’t the last time.  
  
This summer Hajime suddenly disappeared, but it took Tooru a few days to really understand it. Every morning he would run down the stairs with his backpack that had dinosaurs on it (Hajime gave it to him so even tho Oikawa absolutely hated it, he still kept his pencils and papers there) and an ugly alien bear named Shiro with only one leg (also a gift from Hajime, it was his favorite toy) in his hand, smiling brightly and asking if he can go play with Iwa-chan.  
  
“I already told you, Tooru. He left for a camp. He will be back in three weeks,” his mother answered on the second day.  
  
On the fourth day, Tooru visibly lost some of his cheerfulness, as he sat on the kitchen stool and watched his mother make breakfast for him and his sister.  
  
“What’s a camp?” he asked, squeezing his bear in his hands. He missed his best friend and Shiro only reminded him of the fact that he couldn’t play with Hajime now.  
  
“It’s a thing where kids can go during summer to play with other kids and learn new things,” his mom answered, not looking back at him.  
  
These days Tooru always had a feeling she’s upset with him, even when she said it’s not his fault. He didn’t see his dad much, so maybe his mom just missed him like he missed Hajime. Tooru was upset because of that, too.  
  
“Why couldn’t I go with Iwa-chan?” Tooru asked then, pouting a little.  
  
His mother sighed, ﬁnally turning around and ﬂashing her son a tight smile. “Because mommy didn’t have enough money, you know? Maybe you can go with him next year, how about that?”  
  
He smiled at that, wondering what fun things they could do together at this mysterious camp. Maybe they could learn how to swim or add big numbers like older kids?  
  
“That would be awesome!” Tooru agreed, jumping down from the stool and running out of the kitchen.  
  
He tried to ﬁll his days with drawings and reading about people who saw real aliens and were on their ships. He liked some stories, but some of them were ugly. Tooru was sure that aliens didn’t want to hurt people, maybe they were just lonely in space and wanted to meet humans. Space was huge, after all, and Tooru knew because he had a book about it. The universe was endless, that’s what it said and Hajime told Tooru that if something is endless it will never end.  
  
Anyone could feel lonely in a universe like that. Tooru understood the aliens.  
  
When the second week of summer was over, Mineko said she can watch a movie with Tooru if he wants to. They were home alone and Mineko was supposed to watch over him, that’s what mom said, but Neesan never did that anyway, too busy with her phone.  
  
“Why?” he asked because it was suspicious. She was older than him and she said everything Tooru does and likes is for babies, so after some time he stopped asking her to play with him.  
  
“Because you look like a kicked puppy when your little boyfriend isn’t around,” she answered with a shrug, already turning on her laptop. Sometimes, when Tooru asked long enough, she would borrow it to him so he could watch movies with Hajime when he stayed over for the night. That way they could watch in bed and not interrupt in the living room.  
  
“Why would anyone kick a puppy?” Tooru gasped, crawling to the couch beside his sister. He didn’t really like dogs because whenever he was around them, he sneezed a lot, but he would never kick a puppy. Hajime would probably kick him ﬁrst, that boy loved dogs more than dinosaurs. “And what is a boyfriend?”  
  
Mineko looked down at him with a sigh. “You ask too many questions, anyone ever told you that?”  
  
“A lot of people. But if I don’t ask, then how will I know? You know everything because you’re big, right?”  
  
Mineko turned to her brother at that, watching him for a moment. Up until he was six, he was a really small boy. Mineko sometimes overheard their parents talking about it when their father was actually around; mom was worried that something is wrong because surely it couldn’t be normal. Tooru was too short for his age, he got sick a lot and bruised easily ( _though she seemed to forget about that recently,_ Mineko thought bitterly). But some time after his sixth birthday, the boy put on more weight and grew a few inches. Mineko thought that he may even be around Hajime’s height, tho she wasn’t sure because she hasn’t seen that little brat in almost three weeks now but he always spent so much time with Tooru that it was impossible not to notice him.  
  
Tooru’s face was like an open book, honest smiles and glowing eyes that sometimes looked almost golden. But lately the boy lost some of his natural joy that came with discovering new things, that kind of joy that you could only see in kid’s eyes because they were on Earth too short to see the truly bad things. He would ﬂinch whenever someone moved too quickly and Mineko hated the fact that she knew the reason but couldn’t really do anything.  
  
Tooru was a special boy because when other kids his age played with new toys, he preferred to read, he was a fast learner simply because he was never afraid to ask questions and he was adamant when looking for answers.  
  
“I don’t know everything, but… I guess you’re right. If you won’t ask your big sis, then who will enlighten you?” she asked in a softer voice, smiling a little. She wasn’t the best sister, Mineko knew she had no patience for kids, but she could at least try now that the Iwaizumi boy wasn’t around.  
  
“What does enligh–” Tooru started, wide brown eyes looking up at Mineko.  
  
“One question at a time, Tooru,” Mineko sighed, rolling her eyes. “About puppies. Some people are bad and they don’t like animals. See, they’re kind of like kids. They get easily excited and they don’t know when they’re annoying adults. So sometimes instead of telling them that, adults hit puppies. Or kids,” she added quietly, subconsciously looking to a faded bruise on Tooru’s arm. “But that doesn’t mean that puppies or kids are bad, yeah? Adults are stupid like that sometimes.”  
  
Tooru seemed to mull it over in his head and then he nodded, accepting this answer. “And what’s a boyfriend?”  
  
Mineko laughed at that. “You don’t have to know that yet. It was a joke. It’s something like best friend but– but more, I guess.”  
  
Tooru wanted to say that Iwa-chan is his best friend and more, he was his bestest friend ever! But before he could say anything, his attention was drew to the screen with a paused video that Mineko was watching earlier.  
  
“What’s that?”  
  
“Oh, it’s a volleyball game. My team will play with them after summer, so I was watching their old match,” Mineko shrugged, moving to close the window. Tooru quickly caught her hand and asked her to show him.  
  
Tooru knew his sister plays volleyball but he was never really interested in sports, he thought they were boring. But as he watched the game on the screen, he found himself engrossed in every movement and quick actions. The girls were hitting the ball so hard the sound could be heard even with the crowd cheering from the bleachers, but it didn’t look like it hurt them. The quick actions were so cool, Tooru couldn’t tear his eyes away from the girls who kept jumping and hitting the ball between the block of the opposite team to slam it down on the court and score a point. He was pretty sure it was called a spike. But then his eyes shifted to the girl who got the ball just before the ace of the team. She didn’t stand out much but she always tossed the ball high enough for another girl to hit it from above the net.  
  
“What’s that position called?” he asked curiously, poking the screen with his ﬁnger.  
  
“It’s a setter,” Mineko answered with a smirk. “The best position ever.”  
  
“Really? I thought the spiker is the best!”  
  
“No, it’s not. Spikers are just more ﬂashy, you know? Because they score. But you know what they’d do without a setter? Absolutely nothing,” she laughed, rufﬂing Tooru’s hair. “Setter is the mastermind, the schemer, the king or queen of the court. It’s setter’s job to know where to toss the ball. Setter needs to know all his spikers because all of them prefer different kinds of tosses and setter makes them all score, so he needs to know where to toss. It’s the coolest position. I’m a setter,” Mineko announced proudly, turning back to the screen.  
  
Tooru was in awe and for the rest of the match he kept looking at setters on both teams. What Mineko said sounded like a lot of job, knowing all those things about spikers and tosses. Tooru liked to be ﬂashy, so of course spikers were the ﬁrst to peak his interest, but it seemed like setters were even cooler! It would be awesome to be the king of the court, Tooru decided.  
  
He wanted to be a setter. But not just some setter. _The best_ setter.

* * *

“Good morning, is Tooru home?”  
  
Hajime was ﬁnally back. He absolutely hated the camp and he didn’t understand why he had to go. His mom said it will be a nice change of scenery and he can meet new friends there ( _“but I have Tooru,” “I know, honey, but you can have more than one friend,” “but whyyyy?”_ ) but he was just bored all the time, and the other kids were annoying. He was used to Tooru’s annoying, he didn’t want to put up with others. And he didn’t even have the time to say goodbye to Tooru, what if he thought Hajime died?  
  
“Yes, he’s in the backyard. How was the camp, sweetheart?” Tooru’s mom asked,  letting him in with a smile. There was something different about her, like maybe her dress was too big? Hajime couldn’t really say, but maybe he just hasn’t seen her for too long.  
  
“Boring but I learned how to swim,” he informed her, quickly making his way through the hall so he could get to the backyard.  
  
“That’s amazing,” she said and rufﬂed his dark hair a little, opening the balcony door in the living room for him.  
  
Hajime nodded and ran out, already seeing his best friend. Tooru was laying in the grass and throwing a colorful ball up time after time, he wasn’t actually catching it, more like hitting it back up in the air. Hajime came closer but Tooru still didn’t notice him, probably too busy spacing out the way he always did, so for a moment Hajime just watched the seven year old to see if he changed like his mother. He had a yellow shirt and orange shorts on, he also didn’t wear shoes. He looked almost the same as Hajime remembered him but he had a lot of bruises on his legs and arms, one of his ﬁngers was wrapped with white tape. Hajime wondered if the bullies were mean to Tooru again and he felt bad for leaving like that.  
  
“Hey Trashykawa, what’cha doing?” he asked, swaying on the balls of his feet.  
  
Tooru startled and the ball hit his face but he didn’t seem to notice that as he shot up and threw himself at Hajime while screaming _Iwa-chan!_ Hajime laughed and stumbled back a little, hugging Tooru. He realized that his best friend is now as tall as him, even if he still was too skinny.  
  
“For a while I thought the aliens took you instead of Kamitani,” Oikawa said when they both ﬁnally settled on the grass next to each other.  
  
“That would be cooler than the camp,” Iwaizumi decided, looking at the ball in Oikawa’s hands. “Why do you have so many bruises? Should I beat someone up with a stick?” he asked, poking one of the bruises on the boy’s arm which made Tooru ﬂinch away and swat at Hajime’s hand.  
  
“It’s nothing,” Tooru mumbled quickly, ﬁngers squeezing the ball. “I just tripped a lot. But, Iwa-chan, I learned about volleyball! You have to play with me! Mineko showed me a volleyball game and I decided that I’m gonna be the best setter ever. And you could be my ace, you know? Because I’d really like to toss to you,” Tooru blabbered away, excitedly moving his hands and almost hitting Iwaizumi in the process.  
  
Hajime didn’t really understand what his best friend was talking about but he was nodding anyway, because if something could get Tooru this excited beside his aliens, it must have been important and Hajime’s mom told him once that everyone needs something that matters to them. So if Tooru chose aliens and volleyball, Hajime decided that since he didn’t really believe in the ﬁrst one, he could try to like the second one.  
  
The rest of the summer passed with scratched knees and hurting ﬁngers, Mineko helping them with practice and Tooru gushing over some new team he watched one time. Hajime actually liked playing, he liked when ball was tossed high, high, high, and then ﬂew back exactly where he was just so he could smash it to the ground on the other side of the high rope that Tooru’s sister hang for them instead of the net. He liked the feeling of the ball on his palm, the harsh pain that came with it. It was fun, but also more than that, Hajime knew. And he could see it in his best friend’s face, too, the way Tooru’s eyes would light up whenever Hajime could get to the tossed ball in time. It was almost as if Tooru was the one scoring points, Hajime liked that look because it made him feel important.  
  
After summer they both signed up for the volleyball team in their second grade and decided that they always want to play.

* * *

Tooru was eight when his father left for good.  
  
He couldn’t understand why– for a long time he didn’t even know that dad is not coming back. He was home so rarely that not having him there at all didn’t really register to Tooru until he heard his mom and Mineko scream in the living room one time he came back home from his volleyball practice. His mom screamed a lot, but to hear Neesan scream at mom was something new. By this time Tooru became a nervous ball around his mother, jumping at the slightest change in the tone of her voice, that’s why right now he froze in the hallway, back pressing to wooden door and squishing his dinosaur backpack he was deﬁnitely too big for now.  
  
“This isn’t our fault! He never cared about us anyway!” Mineko screamed and something shattered, making Tooru bit his bottom lip so hard he tasted blood.  
  
“Don’t you dare speak to me like that,” their mother answered coldly and Tooru heard the footsteps. His reﬂexes were getting better thanks to sport now but he still didn’t move fast enough to hide anywhere when his mom came out of the room. She stopped shortly and looked at him with an ugly grimace. He always thought his mom is beautiful, but not right now. “You were supposed to be back an hour ago! Where the hell were you?” she asked, _demanded_ , catching his arm and shaking him, her nails painfully digging into his skin.  
  
Tooru trembled, eyes wide. “I-I was with… With Hajime and…” he stuttered, not able to look away from her angry face. Did he do something wrong again? She usually didn’t mind when he played with Iwa-chan a little longer, so Tooru tried to stay with his friend as long as he could. He didn’t like coming back.  
  
“Stop, you’re hurting him!” Mineko yelled from behind their mother, making the woman turn her had. She pushed Tooru away which made him stumble and fall back to the ﬂoor. He was still too close to the door so his head hit the wood, making him see stars and accidentally bite his tongue. “Oh my god, Tooru, are you okay?” Mineko asked scared.  
  
There was just too much noise and movements at once and suddenly Tooru felt like he couldn’t breathe. He quickly scrambled to his feet, ignoring the way everything seemed to be spinning around, and he pushed past his mom and sister to run up the stairs to his room. He quickly closed the door and threw the backpack to the ﬂoor, opening one of the windows.  
  
Hajime’s house was next to his and the boy’s room was exactly opposite to Tooru’s, so when the boys turned six, their parents built a tunnel that connected their windows. After checking hundreds of times that it’s safe, they allowed the boys to use it so now they could spend even more time together and sometimes they would just sit in the tunnel when it was especially hot outside.  
  
Right now Tooru quickly crawled through the tunnel and knocked on Iwa-chan’s window, praying that his best friend was already there.  
  
Hajime opened the window after the fourth knock. “What are you doing, Stupidkawa? We just saw each– what happened?” he asked quickly, almost dragging Tooru into his room and closing the window behind. Tooru didn’t really know what Hajime meant until Hajime raised his hands and started to wipe Tooru’s face with his sleeves.  
  
Tooru didn’t even notice when he started crying. “Can I stay here?” he asked, voice small. His head hurt and tongue did too, he couldn’t even think about going back to his house.  
  
“What a stupid question, you already almost live here,” Hajime answered, squeezing Tooru’s cheeks between his hands. It made Tooru smile despite himself and it clearly pleased Hajime who smiled back at him. “Will you tell me what happened?”  
  
“I think my dad left. And he’s not coming back,” Tooru said, because there was only so much lies that an eight year old could say. He was already lying to Hajime about his bruises, he couldn’t lie about that. Iwa-chan was his best friend, they were supposed to tell each other all secrets.  
  
Hajime’s mouth formed an _O_ shape and then he quickly wiped Tooru’s nose with his sleeve, he was used to that. He always told Tooru that he’s an ugly crier and it didn’t change. Hajime knew for some time that Tooru’s dad just… isn’t there but he was still sad because he absolutely hated to see Tooru like that. Lately his best friend became jumpy and he got scared easily, at ﬁrst it was funny but now it just made Hajime feel bad. The fact that now Tooru was as tall as Hajime didn’t change anything, he still wanted to beat up bullies for him but he didn’t know what to do when Tooru was sad because of his family. Maybe he could ask his mom some other time.  
  
Right now he decided to do what he did when Tooru was six and thought there’s a monster in his closet; he went to bed with Tooru and held his hand for the whole time, promising that everything will be okay, and as long as Hajime's on his side nothing will hurt Tooru because Hajime wouldn’t let that happen.  
  
At eight years old Hajime still believed he could protect his best friend from everything. If only it was that simple.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this turned so dark so fast, i'm so sorry! but everything that happens now is important later in the story, i promise oikawa will have good things because i love him. thank you for reading !!


	3. The first contract.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Whatever, Trashykawa."
> 
> "Iwa-chan!"
> 
> "You said not to call you Stupidkawa! Make up your mind!" Hajime scoffed but finally looked down at the piece of paper in front of him only to look back up at Tooru two seconds later. "What is it?"
> 
> Tooru was practically jumping in place from excitement. "It's a best friend contract!"
> 
> (they're nine and eleven.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tw: mentions of domestic abuse

Oikawa is nine when he slams a paper down on the table in front of Iwaizumi. The latter flinches and almost jumps out of his skin, looking up to see his best friend. Tooru's brown hair was too long, curling slightly on the ends and almost reaching his chin. It was also sticking in all directions, probably because of running if Tooru's red face was any indication. He had his older sister's shirt on, Hajime knew because it was pink and Tooru's mom would never buy him pink clothes, it was also too big but Tooru didn't seem to care that he looks like mess today.

"What is it, Stupidkawa?" Hajime asked, not looking down at the paper. Tooru always did that, he would put books in front of Hajime and smile like a jerk because he knew that Hajime can't stand not knowing and he will look down without Tooru having to tell him. Not this time. This time Hajime was in a mood to annoy Tooru for a change.

"You can just look for yourself, you big bully. I told you to stop calling me that. What if I would call you... Iwa... Um..."

"Don't think so hard or you'll hurt yourself." Hajime laughed at Tooru's pout. 

"What if I will just call you a cryptid?" Tooru finally asked, crossing his arms over the pink shirt with a green alien head on it. He understood why Tooru liked it, but why did Mineko buy it? She didn't like aliens and she didn't like Tooru. 

Hajime titled his head to the side, tapping his pen on the table. "What does it mean?" he asked suspiciously.

Tooru's face broke in the biggest grin Hajime had ever seen. And it was a real smile! Hajime couldn't remember the last time Tooru was really, really happy about something. He asked his mom if she noticed anything weird about Tooru lately but his mom had this look on her face like she would start crying, so Hajime just ran away before she could answer him. Adults were weird. And Oikawa was weird, too, but Hajime didn't mind. He could still make his best friend smile and it was nice.

"It's something really bad, Iwa-chan. So stop calling me Stupidkawa or I will call you a cryptid," the boy threatened, sticking his tongue out.

"Or I will beat you up with a stick."

"You would never," Tooru gasped, putting his hands on the table and leaning a bit closer to Hajime. "You wouldn't hit me, right?" he asked and his voice was a little different. A little... weird, and it was this new kind of weird, not Oikawa's usual weird. Hajime raised his eyebrows, looking over Tooru's pale face and he subconsciously shook his head.

"I wouldn't," Hajime admitted, because that was true. He knew Tooru was asking about a real hit, the one that leaves a bruise for a long time, not about the way Hajime sometimes slaps him upside the head when Tooru's being annoying. And Hajime wouldn't hit him like that. "Whatever, Trashykawa."

"Iwa-chan!"

"You said not to call you Stupidkawa! Make up your mind!" Hajime scoffed but finally looked down at the piece of paper in front of him only to look back up at Tooru two seconds later. "What  _is_  it?"

Tooru was practically jumping in place from excitement. "It's a best friend contract!" he screamed, throwing his hands in the air for the effect. Hajime was afraid that a little more and his face will crack because of the smile.

He rolled his eyes and examined the paper closer. It had a title at the top, big black letters written in a simple font to say _"Oikawa Tooru and Iwaizumi Hajime: best friends contract"_ , it looked ridiculous. But not as ridiculous as the rest of the text. 

> _I, Iwa-chan, promise to:_
> 
> _1\. always listen to Tooru, even when he talks about aliens, volleyball or video games._
> 
> _2\. beat bullies up with a stick when they bother Tooru when he clearly didn't do anything wrong ever._
> 
> _3\. always hit Tooru's tosses because he's the best setter ever._
> 
> _4\. always be there when Tooru needs me which is all the time at any time absolutely ever._
> 
> _5\. laugh at Tooru's jokes in public so he doesn't feel stupid._
> 
> _6\. never keep anything away from Tooru._
> 
> _7\. never do anything to ruin our friendship._
> 
> _8\. never ever leave Tooru and be his best friend forever._

And under this there was a place for Hajime's signature, right next to Tooru's (who scribbled  _"I promise to do the same"_  and already signed the contract). 

"This is stupid. What do I get out of this? You won't listen to me anyway, you wouldn't beat up anyone even to save  _your_  ass, you don't wanna hit my tosses, my jokes are always funny and everyone laugh," Hajime listed, resting his cheek on his hand and looking at Tooru from under his eyelashes.

Tooru scoffed, flopping down into the chair opposite from Hajime. "You get me, of course. Maybe I wouldn't beat up anyone for myself, but I would for you. And I meant that I will always toss to you. Oh, and you haven't told a joke in your entire life," Tooru answered seriously, shrugging his shoulders. Hajime frowned, it sounded so genuine. Like Tooru really, really wanted Hajime to sign this. "You can make your own contract, too, and I will sign it."

Hajime sighed, rolling his eyes and looking down once more. He took his pen and added one more point.

> _9\. only sometimes pretend that I don't know you when you do stupid things in public._

"Iwa-chan, that's rude!" Tooru whined, but when Hajime signed the thing, his best friend practically beamed at him. 

Hajime figured that he was stuck with Tooru anyway, might as well make a deal on paper if Tooru needed this so much. 

It wasn't until Iwaizumi was thirteen that he understood why it was so important to Oikawa though.

* * *

Tooru always liked to sleep in peculiar places, Hajime knew this as well as he knew that Tooru is allergic to chocolate, wants to live on Jupiter and drinks milk straight from the carton but calls Hajime the "heathen" one. Maybe it wasn't really a matter of that Tooru  _liked_  to sleep in those places as much as the fact that he would not sleep for three days straight and then just drop on spot wherever he was at the moment because he was the dumbest person Hajime has ever met.

So, it wasn't really a problem for Hajime when he would come home from a mall and find Tooru draped like a cat over Hajime's windowsill (it was the big kind so Tooru didn't have any troubles fitting his body there) or curled inside his closet. Hajime's mom once found Tooru in their laundry room, sleeping soundly in the basket with freshly folded blankets. That boy could sleep  _anywhere_. 

And it really wasn't a problem for Hajime. But it started to become a problem for everyone else when Tooru and Hajime turned eleven and Tooru started to look like a zombie. He was so pale and the bags under his eyes were almost black. He also started to fall asleep more during the day, on desks at school or under them, in the locker rooms or even in a locker (and okay, if it was Tooru's  _own_  locker maybe no one would complain, but it  _wasn't_ ) and stairs between the floors. Most of the time it was Hajime who would find him (and he really hated Oikawa for this one freak out when he saw Tooru sleeping on the stairs for the first time, because the boys head was on the first step and his ass two steps higher so it looked like he fell, and honestly who even sleeps like that?), but not always and then it became a problem.

Oikawa was a smart kid and he usually didn’t have any troubles with keeping his grades up, they would sometimes slip if he focused too hard on volleyball or new alien sighting he read about online. Truth be told, Tooru’s mom never cared much about that as long as he didn’t have to repeat a year, so unless Minako noticed (and by now Tooru was quite good with hiding things from her) or Iwaizumi knocked some sense back into his friend, Tooru would leave his math homework and science assignments untouched.  
  
Obviously teachers would pick up on that and linking it with the amount of time Tooru spent on school grounds simply sleeping the day away… Well, now it was a problem. Tooru’s mother was informed that her son might not make it to another grade because of science lessons, he had two unﬁnished assignments – one from physics and one from biology. Hajime knew about that, because of course he knew, but whenever he asked Tooru the other boy just said that he’s gonna do everything just ﬁne. By this point Hajime even offered to make the assignments for Tooru, at least one of them, because he really didn’t want his best friend to stay one year longer. But Tooru got offended at that, asking Hajime if he thinks Tooru is stupid and can’t do it himself.  
  
“I know you’re not really stupid, so why you act like the biggest jerk?” Hajime huffed, looking as another volley ball ﬂies across the gym while Oikawa kept practicing his serves. It seemed that lately he spent more time here than anywhere else. “Do you want to have summer school? Or stay one more year?” he kept asking, because he just wanted to understand. He never had a problem with understanding his best friend before.  
  
“I’m not going to stay another year, Iwa-chan,” Tooru sighed, wiping the sweat from his forehead with his sleeve. Then he took another ball, threw it up, took three quick steps and sprung into the air, hitting the ball with a satisfying _thump_. Hajime liked watching him do that. “I just got distracted and I forgot about those projects. But I will hand them in before the semester ends,” Tooru assured but his voice wavered a little.  
  
Hajime tilted his head to the right. “Are you sure? For biology assignment you have to raise your own plant. You think you can do that before the semester ends?” the boy snorted. When Oikawa just took another ball, Hajime came closer and snatched it from the air when Tooru threw it. His friend looked at him with annoyance and tried to grab the ball back, but even though Tooru was a little bit taller than him by now, Hajime was still stronger.  
  
“Give me that!” Tooru whined like a baby. Hajime rolled his eyes and threw the ball to the basket, but his best friend didn’t give up. Tooru tried to push the basket away from Hajime and the latter reacted on an impulse. It was his ﬁrst mistake; around Oikawa no one should do anything on an impulse because Tooru always ﬂinched, jumped or sometimes even tried to hide his head with his arms. He didn’t like when people moved too quickly around him, unless it was on a volleyball court and Tooru always knew what’s going on.  
  
Hajime’s second mistake was that he pushed Tooru away, not hard or on purpose, but it was enough to catch Tooru off guard and send him down to the wooden ﬂoor of the gym. In the quiet space the fall sounded even louder, or maybe it was just in Iwaizumi’s head where the last few seconds were being replayed. Tooru was looking up at him with those wide brown eyes, he wasn’t hurt, he was shocked and Hajime immediately felt like the biggest idiot in Japan. He pushed the basket away and tried to crouch next to Tooru, but the boy quickly slid back and stood up, tripping a little over his own sneakers.  
  
“Tooru, I’m so–”  
  
“You’re not my mom, Iwaizumi!” Tooru interrupted him, his small hands curling into ﬁsts. They were red from hitting the ball too many times. Hajime knew his friend is really mad because only then he called him Iwaizumi. “You’re not my mom, so don’t act like her! You said you would never hit me. She said that too, you know? But then she did what you did, and… and–” his voice broke a little as he tried to wipe his eyes with ﬁsts.  
  
Hajime held his breath. He _knew_. He wasn’t a stupid kid and even despite being only eleven, he knew what “abusive parents” mean. He saw all the bruises on his best friend’s body, but he accepted Tooru’s explanation that he’s just clumsy, after all Oikawa always bruised easily. He accepted Tooru’s explanation that he just “felt like having a sleepover” when the boy climbed through his window every few days, because after all Oikawa always was clingy. He accepted it because it was easier for a child to understand than face the fact that his best friend is being abused by his mother. But now that Tooru practically said it out loud, he couldn’t ignore it or pretend that it’s not true.  
  
“She’s hitting you,” he stated. There wasn’t a subtle way to say this, but Hajime felt like an asshole anyway when Tooru ﬂinched just because of those words.  
  
Tooru shook his head, stepping back. “I don’t want to talk about it. Just– leave me alone, Iwa-chan,” the boy muttered, turning around and running out of the gym before Hajime could start breathing normally again.  
  
Even if he wanted to, he wouldn’t know what to say. Should he tell his mom about it? Probably, but if she’ll be able to help was another thing. Whenever Hajime saw Tooru’s mom, she was smiling like nothing was wrong, she always wore pretty dresses and rufﬂed Tooru’s hair. It looked almost like she loved him, but if she did she wouldn’t hit him, right?  
  
For an eleven years old Hajime love was just too difﬁcult to understand.

* * *

Oikawa decided that he hated ﬁghting with Iwa-chan. They never did this before, at least not for real, because only adults fought over stupid things. They were best friends, they weren’t supposed to ﬁght. But what Tooru hated even more was when someone raised their hands at him. He knew Hajime didn’t really think about it, Tooru was still trying to get used to how impulsive his best friend was now and he was getting better at it, but sometimes he just got scared and… Well, things like the incident at the gym happened.  
  
Right now Tooru was sitting on the ﬂoor in his bedroom in fresh clothes with a fresh bruise under his eye. Of course his mother wasn’t happy that he could stay for another year, so now Tooru was making this stupid rocket for physics as he imagined that it could take him to space. Maybe he would meet aliens, surely they were nicer than people around him, right? They’re super smart, after all.  
  
Tooru’s hands hurt from the volleyball practice and he had two ﬁngers bandaged together because one of them was sprained, but he wanted to go back to the gym. When he was there, the only thing he could think about was where, how and to who he should toss the ball. His sister told him he’s going to be a better setter than her because he already could think of strategies that would win for their team. But Tooru knew it’s not the only reason he was going to be good, it was mostly because he dedicated every free second to this sport. It was his salvation when the noise in his head got too loud. He was only eleven, but he understood things much better than most kids his age and he knew that his family situation will only get worse, so he needed something to hold onto in order not to break.  
  
He had Hajime, but he didn’t want to put so much pressure on his best friend because Tooru got told multiple times by many people that he’s annoying and hard to handle. He didn’t want Hajime to leave him the way his father and grandfather (who died eight months ago) did, he didn’t know how he’d deal with it. And he had read somewhere that his pain was his own to hold, no one else’s.  
  
Maybe Tooru was annoying, but he was a good person.

Lately his mom started to come home really late and Tooru tried to fall asleep before she did because otherwise there was always something she didn't like and their fights kept Tooru awake at night. He was always agreeing with her, of course, even if he _did_ clean the house as best as he could and he _did_ eat the dinner she made the previous day. It was just easier to nod than to try and actually say anything when she was mad. Tooru loved her a lot and he wanted her to smile at him at least once so if being quiet would make that happen, then he could do that. He could not sleep at night to sit with her when she talked about her work if it meant that she won't raise her voice.

It wasn't even that bad.

The boy raised his head when something hit his window. He carefully put the racket down and scrambled to his feet, wincing a little when he accidentally leaned on his bad ﬁnger. Iwa-chan was kneeling inside the tunnel on the other side and he had some weird plant in his hand. Tooru instinctively hid the bruise on his face with one hand, opening the window with another. Hajime always opened his own window for Tooru, he couldn’t not do the same.  
  
Hajime jumped off of the windowsill and put the plant on Tooru’s desk, at the same time catching his best friend’s wrist to peel his hand away from his cheek. The bruise was dark under Tooru’s right eye, purple with red spot in the middle.  
  
“What did she hit you with?” he asked quietly, his ﬁngers grazing slightly over Tooru’s cheek. The boy wasn’t looking at him, instead his eyes were glued to the plant Hajime brought with him. “Trashykawa.”  
  
“A porcelain ﬁgure. One of the elephants from the living room,” Tooru muttered ﬁnally, shrugging. His mother used to collet those ﬁgures, they were supposed to bring luck to whoever owned them. They didn’t bring much luck to him.  
  
Hajime was looking at the bruise for a while, lightly touching it with his thumb. He tried to tell his mom today, but he had no idea how. Every family had their problems, in Hajime’s case it was money, but that was different from what Tooru was going through. Hajime always knew his best friend is strong, he even stood up to those idiots that were bullying him since he was six. When they were kids, they would sleep in one bed and hold hands to make each other feel better, but now they were older and even though they still shared the bed, they thought holding hands is stupid. They changed it for a hard pat on the back because now they were stronger.  
  
So Hajime pushed the concern down for now, hit his best friend on the back and took the plant from the table. “It’s for you biology project. When I started my own, I asked my mom to help me with another one because I knew you won’t do it. For someone who loves plants, you take shit care of them,” he stated, smiling at Tooru’s pout. “I’m sorry for being a jerk in the gym. My Ma said that even if I didn’t mean it, it’s still not okay and I should think more about what I do, so… I’m gonna do that,” he ended awkwardly, handing the plant to Tooru.  
  
“Don’t worry about it, I know I’m superior to you when it comes to controlling my body, Iwa-chan. You’re too stupid to understand it yet,” Tooru sighed dramatically. Hajime rolled his eyes and elbowed his friend, because Oikawa had it coming. They both laughed and things shifted a little, maybe going back to normal between them. “Thank you. Do you want to stay? I need to ﬁnish my rocket but you can read my comics if you want.”  
  
“How about I help you with the rocket so then we can read comics together? It will be funnier with different voices,” Hajime offered, sitting down on the ﬂoor beside Tooru’s project. The other boy smiled brightly and nodded, setting the plant on the windowsill and closing the door with a key. Just in case.  
  
And in the quiet of Tooru’s room, with just the two of them, the things were almost good. Everything was almost okay.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i felt like the way tooru's mom treats him is really important to the story so i focused on it a little bit more in this chapter too but! there are happy things to come so hang in there. thank you for reading!!


	4. Birthday.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "What about me? You don't want to be friends anymore? What about your stupid contract?"
> 
> (they're thirteen.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry for any mistakes, i was too tired to read it again

"Iwa-chan, don't be such a baby!"

"Shut up, Trashykawa, this thing is trying to bite my head off!"

"Your dad is a vet, aren't you supposed to be good with animals?"

"It's not an animal, it's a demon. Probably Cerberus."

"Well then who's guarding Tartarus now?"

"Shut. Up."

That's how Oikawa's thirteenth birthday went down. His mother was god knows where, probably not remembering about it anyway, Minako was at university and wouldn't be home before the weekend, so that left Tooru with Hajime who didn't want to deal with a whiny Oikawa all day so he crawled through his window right after midnight to wish him happy birthday and scare the living shit out of him, because Hajime had to have some fun too. And now, ten hours later, Hajime was under a truck, trying to get a stray puppy out of there after Tooru saw it while retrieving their ball.

It didn't make any sense, Tooru was allergic to fur and sneezed whenever Hajime did as much as hang out with him after helping his dad in the shelter, so the fact that he suddenly wanted to save some dog was odd. But it was his birthday so Hajime just crawled under the car and by now the hot ground was making him sweat through his light shirt and it honestly shouldn't be this hot at only ten in the morning. 

The puppy, a small Shiba, didn't appreciate Hajime's efforts in the slightest. It growled low in its throat whenever Hajime extended a hand to try and grab it, and when the boy finally touched the orange and white fur, the puppy almost bit his hand off. He was usually good with animals, dogs especially, but just not this one. 

"Screw that, I'm gonna call my dad," Hajime hissed, getting out from under the truck. Oikawa was kneeling next to his legs and trying to peak under the big car, worry clear on his face.

"But it's really hot, it can get hurt if it stays on this ground for too long. And what if the truck moves?" Oikawa voiced his worried, his brown eyes not leaving the big tires.

"Well, I can't really do shit if the dog won't let me hold it!" Hajime yelled with frustration, wiping the sweat from his forehead. Oikawa huffed irritated and before Hajime could even think about it, the other boy was halfway under the car, crawling further on the hot asphalt. "What the hell are you doing? Why do you even care? You never go to the shelter with me."

Oikawa huffed and sighed some more, but he was skinnier than Iwaizumi, so it was easier for him to slide into the small space under the truck. "This puppy is... Just scared..." he hissed out, feet wringing a little. "Maybe someone hurt him and now no one wants him. I'm not leaving him here," Tooru decided with determination. Because he did everything with determination, facing things head on. Although usually he thought things through a little bit more than right now. 

But it did make sense, in a way, that this stupid kid would see himself in a stray dog. Hajime felt like shit for not being able to say anything to that.

"Fine but don't let it bite you."

Oikawa mumbled something and then Iwaizumi could hear a quiet squeal followed by Oikawa's huff. The boy slowly started to crawl out and a few minutes later he was sitting cross legged on the ground with a small puppy in his arms. The dog was shaking but it didn't try to bite Oikawa like it did with Iwaizumi, it looked scared but not of Tooru, more like in general. 

"See? What a good boy," Oikawa cooed, smiling brightly at his best friend. Iwaizumi snorted and looked at the dog, shaking his head.

"It's a girl, Stupidkawa," he informed upon closer inspection.

Oikawa blinked and looked down at the puppy he was hugging. Then he shrugged a little. "What a good girl," he said instead, making Iwaizumi roll his eyes.

In the end they took the dog to Hajime's father who checked her and said she has a broken leg. Besides that everything seemed to be fine but she didn't have a collar, so she would have to stay at the shelter while they made fliers to see if anyone would come for her. Oikawa looked kind of weird when they were leaving the shelter and he asked what will happen to her if the owner won't come claim her.

"Probably someone else will take her. She's a really nice looking Shiba so I'm sure a lot of people will want her," Hajime said, thinking that this is what his best friend wants to hear. But then Tooru frowned even more, looking down at his shoes and kicking some pebbles out of his way. "What is it? You don't have to worry about her, it's a good shelter and they will take care of her," he assured because it was true. Hajime often helped around here because his father let him and Hajime loved being around dogs even tho his mom still didn't want to let him have his own one. He was on a good way to convincing her thought, he could absolutely feel it. Right now her only argument was that Oikawa was allergic and Hajime wouldn't be able to hang out with him because that would make Tooru sick. Which was a good argument but Hajime was sure he would figure something out. 

"It's not that. It's just... You know," Tooru shrugged, wiping his eyes that were already getting red because of the dog. By the time they come back home he'll be sneezing and his eyes are going to get even more watery. Hajime couldn't imagine being allergic to animals, it would be the worst thing ever for him.

Hajime frowned. "What? You want to take her? You would literally die a week after," the boy snorted, stuffing his hands into his pockets and looking at Tooru from the corner of his eye. Oikawa shrugged, turning his gaze away. "Oh my god, are you serious?"

"I don't know! I just feel like it would be nice to take her. Because I found her and I will think about her even when someone else takes her, because what if they won't treat her right?" Tooru sounded defensive, crossing his arms over his chest.

Hajime stopped in the middle of the sidewalk, raising his eyebrows. "You're allergic, Stupidkawa," he pointed out. He felt like sometimes Tooru needed a reminder about most basic things he should know himself.

"I know that, Iwa-chan, but I want her," he whined miserably and almost immediately sneezed as if to prove Iwaizumi's point.

"You can always wait and if no one takes her then... Well, you can adopt her," Hajime said carefully. He tried no to think about how unfair that was because Tooru was the reason Hajime didn't have a dog and now _Tooru_ wanted a dog? It sounded like a bad joke. But if the dog would make him happy... even despite the runny nose and watery eyes, then Hajime guessed it's a good thing. 

Tooru seemed to be thinking about it for a long moment before sighing and starting to walk again. "I don't know if my mom will agree. But that would be nice. I'm going to ask her when she's... When she's back," he said more quiet, offering Hajme a forced version of his wide smile.

Hajime smiled back, hoping that Tooru's mom will let him have this one thing if that was what Tooru really wanted.

"Okay. Do you want to go for ice-cream? My Ma gave me some money. After we can go to my house for your present," he offered, bumping Oikawa's shoulder a little. The boy's face lit up at that and he was nodding even before Hajime finished. 

They boy got ice-cream, Hajime took chocolate and Tooru bubblegum because of course he couldn't choose something normal. When they were back at Hajime's house, they told his mom about the dog and while she was surprised that Tooru wanted to take it, she also looked defeated, like she knew that now Hajime will be even more persistent in asking for hiw own pet. However, she told Tooru she hopes his mother says yes.

"Okay, now I'm gonna give you your gift. It's not really anything great but..." Hajime shrugged a little when Oikawa sat on his bed with anticipation clear on his face.

Tooru huffed. "It's the only gift I'm getting, I'm sure it's amazing," he said and smiled at his best friend. But it only made Hajime feel worse. He knew it's true, Tooru's mom stopped giving him things when he turned ten and his sister was a college student so she didn't really have money either. That's why Iwaizumi always tried to buy him something cool, something he'd really like but he was bad at that and hiw mom always said he knows Tooru better so he should just choose alone. 

Right now he couldn't do anything about it anyway, so he just took the gift out of his closet and set it on the bed in front of Oikawa. The other boy slowly started to unwrap it, last year he cut his finger on the paper and had a small breakdown so now he was careful (Hajime also used different kind of paper, wrapping the box in a smaller amount of it just in case). When he finally opened it, Hajime held his breath and crossed his fingers, hoping the gift wasn't a complete disaster. But then Oikawa looked up with wide eyes and there was pure _awe_ on his face, just like when Hajime scored a point out of his set or laughed at his joke, and Iwaizumi sighed with relief. 

Oikawa quickly took a shirt out and held it in front of his face, looking at the number and a name. It was Saori Kimura, number 3, his favorite female volleyball player from Japan. The shirt might be a little too big but they didn't have anything smaller on the site Hajime ordered it from, but he figured out it won't matter much. Oikawa always stole shirts from his sisters or Iwaizumi, and they were too big for him too because Hajime had broader shoulders and wasn't as skinny as Tooru. His friend liked big clothes.

There were also five seasons of The X-Files, Tooru's favorite TV show, and a pretty kaleidoscope Hajime accidentally found in the mall the other day. It wasn't anything special but-

"This is the best gift I've got in my life, Iwa-chan!" Tooru yelled happily, already taking off his dirty shirt to put the new one on. It almost immediately slid off his shoulder but Oikawa didn't even notice. 

Hajime cleared his throat, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly. He didn't like when Oikawa was thanking him, it was weird because it almost never happened. 

"It's nothing," he muttered with a shrug, putting the torn up paper in the trashcan next to the door.

"Can we watch it now?" Tooru asked, holding the DVD with season one. Hajime sighed, he guessed he only had himself to blame for it.

"It's your birthday, we can do whatever you want."

Tooru _beamed_ at him and Hajime wasn't even annoyed. After all, Oikawa always got his way with him.  
  
They've spent the rest of the day in Hajime's room, watching The X-Files and playing video games. In the evening Hajime's mom made omurice for dinner, it was Tooru's favorite dish, and later Oikawa agreed to watch the Godzilla movie with Iwaizumi. But Hajime couldn't focus on it because Oikawa kept glancing at the clock and he nervously tugged on the hem of his new shirt. Iwaizumi knew Tooru's wondering when his mom will be back and he decided to distract him a little. 

"Why do you want to take the dog anyway?" he asked, adjusting the pillows a little. The laptop was on his thighs, Oikawa was lying beside him with his head on Hajime's shoulder (it was his favorite position to watch movies and even though his wavy hair tickled Hajime's cheek, he stopped trying to push Tooru off the bed because it always ended in a pillow fight and his mother wasn't thrilled when he told her he needs new pillows again), and Oikawa's ugly alien bear was between them because  _Shiro wants to watch too, Iwa-chan!_ Oikawa was such a child.

The boy blinked sleepily. "Because a dog won't leave me," he muttered, nuzzling his head in the crook of Hajime's neck. He would fall asleep in approximately twenty minutes, he always did when he acted like that. 

Iwaizumi frowned at that. "What do you mean, Trashykawa?"

"Everyone leaves but if I will take good care of my dog, it will love me. It won't hurt me and it will stay," Tooru explained carefully, like he was just thinking about what to say.

"What about me? You don't want to be friends anymore? What about your stupid contract?" Hajime asked with annoyance. He couldn't help it.

Iwaizumi didn't have any other friends. Not that he didn't want to, he was just really freaking shy even if neither his family nor Tooru would say so. But he knew them since he was a baby, he was comfortable around them but not around strangers and someone told him once that he can come off as cold and even rude, apparently he 'had that face'. So basically he didn't have anyone besides Tooru and even if the brat usually annoyed him, was too loud and too clingy, criticized most things Hajime did, Hajime still didn't want Tooru to stop being his friend. He signed the damn contract! It was for life, right?

Tooru answered after a moment of silence, his eyes were already closed. "Don't worry about the contract, it was stupid. You can leave anytime you want, I can't stop you if you want to find another best friend. My mom said people aren't forever." He yawned after that and before Hajime could think of an answer, Tooru's breath started to even out. Few minutes later he was already asleep.

The move was still playing but Iwaizumi couldn't hear anything anymore. He just kept thinking about how Tooru was lately looking at him whenever he thought Hajime doesn't notice. He was asking more often if Hajime is sure he has time to play volleyball or just hang out with him, and he stopped crawling to his room through the tunnel outside the window. Iwaizumi thought it's because Oikawa is tired of being his friend but it wasn't like that at all. 

It made sense now; the best friends contract, the questions, the dog. Oikawa just thought that Iwaizumi will leave him the way his father, grandfather and god knows who else did before. He wanted a dog to have anyone in case his best friend would eventually be gone because his mom told him that things like that happen.

It was pissing Iwaizumi off. He told Tooru thousands of times he's not going anywhere and yet this idiot questioned him. Iwaizumi would do his own contract if that would help, it if would make Tooru believe him. Maybe they were only thirteen and Hajime had no idea what will happen in a year or two, but whenever he imagined it Oikawa was always there with him.

Hajime was here to stay, he knew that and he wanted Oikawa to know that too. So he will make sure to tell him when he wakes up.

And he will make sure Oikawa gets this dog he wants because that's what best friends do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> in the next chapter i'm gonna jump a little and i think they will be sixteen or something


End file.
